Thinking to marry a rich guy?

I found an interesting read, go here.

An Overt Crowd (today)

...whatever that came into mind......

I exert an extremely low-leveled patience for people with little/no sense of urgency. They slow me down, they make me less ambitious, they are wasting my time, worst of the lot, they influence me. I do tend to feel bad (only in certain cases) because i get a tad too aggressive when dealing with them. I still do not know the proper and appropriate way to handle this, hmmphh. Avoidance sounds smart, but it works only on a temporal ground. They return to haunt me again and again.

On another hand, they hate people like me. Who are always pushing them, giving them hard time. They want easy life, they want to take things slow and easy. They know how to enjoy life and take advantage of their comfortable living. I am usually turned off by them, when they finally want to start doing something, i won't put as much effort as i wanted before. I find the constant need to motivate myself to strive for my best in what i deemed not important anymore.

Some, are overly ambitious, up to a point they are oblivious with the little important facts. For them, the world seemed to revolve around them, and would most likely to shut off from everything else. Ambitions matched with poor planning, is disastrous. In the end if lucky they pass, when most do not, only then they become humble.

And some, are simply humble and amazing. They accord to you even when they believe fully in their own opinions, they are humble and easy-going. They can tolerate you and still smile. But sometimes you wish they start taking actions and voice up. These are people who motivate me, they make me want to do better and contribute for the best outcomes. I adore them.

Hmmmmm.

To my bestest best friend :)

Happy Birthday to you Joo Yee! I know you love me, "oh well..." But i know you love me even more after today, after watching the video :p I did not expect this evening would be a success and i thought it has much to do with all our years of friendship. You know, i know, we know, no need to elaborate. The evening was really fun and i know you loved it lah ok. HAPPY 19TH AND LOVE YOU!!!

Me likey this photo :p

Tick, tick, tickkkk

I did some simple calculation.

Take the average retirement age, 55. Subtract 20 (my age) from 55 and i get 35 years.

Multiply 35 with 365 days and i get 12,775 days. From 12,775, minus out the days i won't be working (ex: vacation, ill, problems, unprecedented events etc).

Which means, i only have less than 12,775 days for me to build my empire. And the clock is ticking away obliviously as i am still amazed at this figure.

I have a problem: I think i still have time, and i'm taking the time for granted thinking i'm still young to take actions. Something's not right with me. What am i doing?

Let say, i live until 80. I only have 21,900 days to go. Life is brief.

Of course we all know this, but i never really care. I skipped the important cue, which is: Time is diminishing.

Bottomline: Live every minute to its fullest. At least when you die, you will be so willing to leave because, you've done everything you want. You love to sleep? Can, you can sleep all you want after you die.

On a long enough timeline, the survival rate of everything drops to zero.

~Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club

On a long enough timeline, the survival rate of life and time drop to zero. Stop mourning the past, don't linger on little mistakes, don't let them get in your way. You are bright and potential, the world is your stage, the camera is already rolling since the day you were born, stop postponing your chances now.

Time is a scarce resource, we should allocate it efficiently for our maximum benefits. If not, you bear the high cost.

Lighthouse

So, for the past few months, or maybe just weeks (whatever, not the main point), i knock my head hard to force out bits and bits to think what my life is all about. It's like squeezing banana for juice. I know, i may be late in this process but heck, at least i found something, and i think it's good for my personal growth.

I find life, is more than what i see it is. Obviously there's still room for me at this, considering i am still "young". For many years i denied Jesus purposefully (wait, actually, i don't have a specific reason) but yes, i deny Him for the sake of denying him because denial makes life easier for me at those points of time in my life. The problem with me is, i treat everything with an indifference attitude. I never look at one situation and reason, okay, why is it this way, and why is this not that way. For the sake of "ignorance is bliss", i just go whatever none of my business which is a mistake i value as very very very costly considering all the insights i could get. It's okay...

Bear with me.

Another thing about me is, i tended to be a person who avoids, and probably i still am. Avoidance is my forte and i kid you not. I avoid people, i avoid opportunities, i avoid cute boys (clearly stupid), i avoid saying grace for meals especially with outsiders around (yes, i am timid), i avoid beautiful chances, i avoid speaking up. And all of these, i must tell you, i always have good reasons and excuses to cover them up nicely but obviously the more i do it, nobody's gonna buy it.

I am very self-conscious, which, anyone can proudly testify for me: I am very size and weight- conscious. I am so self-conscious and in my case, i developed a very shy attitude. Therefore i avoid. Avoidance brings me no good and no far, clearly. Put simply, i obey the limits of my personal comfort zone very very faithfully. I am sad.

You might already know these about me.

So, back to my point. While evaluating what my life was and before, i try to forecast what i could do on the prospective grounds. Of course i thought about having all the money i want, great husband, beautiful kids, proud parents, wardrobes after wardrobes of clothes and shoes...... but i'm not stupid to such level to think life can be so easily deciphered. What i see is, there is no purpose for what i will be doing, what i will be achieving in the future.

Although putting myself in that one million dollar shoes, i am still not satisfied. Life is more than that. Wealth only covers an acute degree of one's life pie. You can be the nobel prized scientist invented an anti global warming ionizer which filters our highly polluted air and save us all from a melting globe, yes you did the mankind a big favor, but above all that question asked is, what are you doing it for?

I am not trying to influence your religious views, this is my story.

I have wonderful parents, they are not stupid people. Everyday i see them holding their bibles and reading the words of God. Every day they reinforce the goodness of their Lord Jesus Christ. I'm always amazed to see a person like my father, a businessman, would spend his hours sitting down reading the bible. When ask why, he just smiled at me and say, This (the Bible) is the source of blessing, if i don't read this, what else you want me to read? I saw a humble side of him and that is simply amazing enough. I always want to cling onto older people for wisdom, hope for them to guide me with their wisdom and experience, i sit in lecture halls learning from older people. And if so many old people believes in God, it will be very stupid for me to say God is a non-existent.

So, i gave in. I only found God as the purpose of life. I feel the love of the church when worshiping Him, testifying His Greatness. I see people crying for Him, hunger for His Love, turning to Him for comfort. And he answers them, they are happier people. In fact, i don't think they could be any happier knowing they found the most awesome God. Which is an inspiration to me.

From now onwards, i want to leave my comfort zone and hunt for him. I believe we should look for God ourselves, know the truth, be willing to delve in His words. It is a matter of personal choice i think. I will step out from my awful past, and give myself one more chance to know the true God. No more avoidance from awkward situations, even if i'm nervous, i believe after a few times i can do it better than anyone else. I'm not going to restraint myself from growing, that's just idiotic. Although i don't know how to pray to God, i must learn, and i want to pray together in prayer meetings, pray for people in need and pray for myself.

From now onwards, my purpose of life, is God. I'm gonna do it for the Glory of His Name.

5205911

Wo,

"I love you also means I love you more than anyone loves you, or has loved you, or will love you, and also, I love you in a way that no one loves you, or has loved you, or will love you, and also, I love you in a way that I love no one else, and never have loved anyone else, and never will love anyone else. "

-Jonathan Safran Foer

hen wu liao